What the freakin' hell, man?Seriously, this movie is SCARY!
Yesterday was not the gubernatorial election. Just the primary. Sorry. I was confused. I told you guys--- I'm clueless about KY politics. Well, my man Gatewood Galbraith got a whopping 6% of the vote. Those were probably the state's pot smokers because he wants to legalize medical marijuana and drives a car fueled by hemp oil. What's the big friggin' deal? I will resist the urge to break out in Outkast lyrics. So, Ernie Fletcher and Steve Beshear will go at it for Governor. Steve Beshear, the democrat, has been entrenched in local politics since the 70's. I'm pretty sure he's got very little of his soul left. And I know the republican, Ernie Fletcher's soul has been gone for a very long time. Apparently, since he's been governor, he's been involved in quite the scandal since he was elected in 2003. The administration was firing and hiring in the state system based on political loyalties. Yikes. Don't worry, though, he pardoned everyone! Thank God no one was held accountable!
Okay- enough politics. Let's talk about my neuroses. Ever since the Va. Tech shootings which now seem long forgotten, I have been a nervous wreck. I'm convinced I'll be shot down any day now. It doesn't help that I work in a university. A couple weeks ago, I was walking home from work and saw a man with what looked to be a gun aimed at the street. He paused a moment and rested the "gun" on his shoulder with the scope pointing toward the sky. I stopped in sheer terror and squinted my eyes to see the man more closely. As I did this, he turned from the street to face me. From 30 yards away, I thought I was staring into the distant barrel of a gun. For about ten seconds, I stood still, my heart pounding, waiting to feel or hear the bullets come at me. When nothing happened, I mustered up my courage and began to slowly walk toward the man. If I was going down, it would be with dignity. I thought of our little family, and Scott having to raise Hawkins on his own. I wondered who would help him. I realized after a few steps that the man was holding a camera with an extremely long zoom lens, a foot at least. That half minute, though, when I thought the end was upon me, was seriously intense. I wonder what I would have seen if I hadn't been plagued by thoughts of that wacko job Cho.
Every afternoon, I pass the same woman a few blocks from our house. She waits at the bus stop for the #29 going down Eastern Pkwy. Yesterday, it occured to me that she could be plotting to kill me. This lady is about 65 years old, white hair, 350lbs. and under 5 foot. She should NOT inspire fear in anyone. And I'm pretty sure I could take her down if it came to it (as long as I didn't get pinned underneath her). Her glasses are pretty thick, so her aim is probably not great if she's going to be shooting at me.
So, what is my problem? It's this whole freakin' motherhood thing, I think. I remember when I was pregnant, I would walk by someone on the street and be convinced that they were going to push me into traffic. The knot in my stomach only went away once I had passed them by. It makes me so sad for other moms that die when their children are young. It must hurt so bad to let them go. Then again, it probably hurts just as bad when they are older because even my mom sees me as a child and I'm the big, fat, ugly 30.
Violence and death can be so damn RANDOM. I mean, those kids at Va. Tech were just going to class. And I need to stop getting People Magazine when the front cover relates to a murder or kidnapping. It's just too much for me. Thank god we don't have tv, or I'd be obsessing over the news every evening. I don't think the movie we watched last night helped things either. Scott says he put it on the netflix queue, but I thought I had. WHATEVER. Beware of Pan's Labyrinth. It is certainly not the Alice in Wonderland-esque film I thought it would be. It was freakin' BRUTAL and depressing and too much. I mean, we get it! The Captain is evil! You don't have to keep showing him bash peoples' faces in and torture people. Ugh. I had to go in my room and close the door twice during the stupid thing, because I could not handle it.
Our farm delivery is today. The email said we gots ourselves some broccoli and strawberries, too! Fresh from the earth, y'all! Praise the Lawd. Plus, we get our camcorder today. Maybe I'll have a fancy video clip soon! Remember, the camera adds 65 pounds, okay! I'm really like Nicole Richie. Scott is worried.
Okay- enough politics. Let's talk about my neuroses. Ever since the Va. Tech shootings which now seem long forgotten, I have been a nervous wreck. I'm convinced I'll be shot down any day now. It doesn't help that I work in a university. A couple weeks ago, I was walking home from work and saw a man with what looked to be a gun aimed at the street. He paused a moment and rested the "gun" on his shoulder with the scope pointing toward the sky. I stopped in sheer terror and squinted my eyes to see the man more closely. As I did this, he turned from the street to face me. From 30 yards away, I thought I was staring into the distant barrel of a gun. For about ten seconds, I stood still, my heart pounding, waiting to feel or hear the bullets come at me. When nothing happened, I mustered up my courage and began to slowly walk toward the man. If I was going down, it would be with dignity. I thought of our little family, and Scott having to raise Hawkins on his own. I wondered who would help him. I realized after a few steps that the man was holding a camera with an extremely long zoom lens, a foot at least. That half minute, though, when I thought the end was upon me, was seriously intense. I wonder what I would have seen if I hadn't been plagued by thoughts of that wacko job Cho.
Every afternoon, I pass the same woman a few blocks from our house. She waits at the bus stop for the #29 going down Eastern Pkwy. Yesterday, it occured to me that she could be plotting to kill me. This lady is about 65 years old, white hair, 350lbs. and under 5 foot. She should NOT inspire fear in anyone. And I'm pretty sure I could take her down if it came to it (as long as I didn't get pinned underneath her). Her glasses are pretty thick, so her aim is probably not great if she's going to be shooting at me.
So, what is my problem? It's this whole freakin' motherhood thing, I think. I remember when I was pregnant, I would walk by someone on the street and be convinced that they were going to push me into traffic. The knot in my stomach only went away once I had passed them by. It makes me so sad for other moms that die when their children are young. It must hurt so bad to let them go. Then again, it probably hurts just as bad when they are older because even my mom sees me as a child and I'm the big, fat, ugly 30.
Violence and death can be so damn RANDOM. I mean, those kids at Va. Tech were just going to class. And I need to stop getting People Magazine when the front cover relates to a murder or kidnapping. It's just too much for me. Thank god we don't have tv, or I'd be obsessing over the news every evening. I don't think the movie we watched last night helped things either. Scott says he put it on the netflix queue, but I thought I had. WHATEVER. Beware of Pan's Labyrinth. It is certainly not the Alice in Wonderland-esque film I thought it would be. It was freakin' BRUTAL and depressing and too much. I mean, we get it! The Captain is evil! You don't have to keep showing him bash peoples' faces in and torture people. Ugh. I had to go in my room and close the door twice during the stupid thing, because I could not handle it.
Our farm delivery is today. The email said we gots ourselves some broccoli and strawberries, too! Fresh from the earth, y'all! Praise the Lawd. Plus, we get our camcorder today. Maybe I'll have a fancy video clip soon! Remember, the camera adds 65 pounds, okay! I'm really like Nicole Richie. Scott is worried.
9 comments:
I really hope pot gets legalized, man. you know how i loved to sit on the grassy knoll at pius and smoke a doobie, amber. and then me and mentez would get the muchies and make a mad dash to Krispy effing Kreme, amber.
and i am afraid of guns too.
Mentez' gun. he packs the heat, amber.
You were such a stoner, Katie! Joe is always like, "Hey, mom! Don't forget to pass the bong to me!" I mean, Katie, just because he's young doesn't mean you can keep all the pot to yourself!
oh, trust me, amber. i share my ganga. what do you think joe's brownies were made out of the other day? yeah. that's right.
do you remember when we were all at molly's in highschool and i was acting like i was drunk? abby poole was there too. and maybe Jill Faubert. stop acting like you weren't friends with her!
and you know you wheeled W.O.W. into the men's bathroom and left her there blind folded with a jockstrap on her head! oh, amber!
Why was Abbie Poole there? That's so damn random!
Who did that to Mrs. Guscio? I can't remember. I do remember Fred Smith going behind her chair and dirty dancing with her behind her back. So terrible.
Whatever, Katie- Jessica Scarlatto would have been at Lettuce Souprise You with us after the SATs if you hadn't popped a wheelie and sped off with me chasing you to lose her. Poor thing.
Yo Katie and Amber, You guys are exhibiting a bit too much queerboscity for me. But I agree, Ganga is meant to be shared.
When I was in college I took a romantic literature course and we spent some time on Wordsworth. I remember reading Strange fits of passion I have known and thinking how stupid is it to worry about the safety of one's loved ones...until I married and again when I became a father.
What fond and wayward thoughts will slide
Into a Lover's head!
"O mercy!" to myself I cried,
"If Lucy should be dead!"
The copmplete poem can be found here:
http://www.bartleby.com/145/ww146.html
How silly, I thought to be concerned about someone's safety. Well...the title fits.
As I write this, Blue Oyster Cult is on the radio..."Don't fear the Reaper"
See you in St. Looey, Looey
UNK
I hope you know I was joking, Unkle Rob, about the pot and all. Katie teaches pre-school. She's not a stoner.
Uncle Rob, I am in fact known as The Midnite Toker, okay?
Love you, Uncle Rob. :)
Amber, I remember i had to high tail it away from Scarlato. She had a weird thing with me and it just didn't work out. i can't believe you brought her name up. i am so hurt.
Katie, if you don't get into heaven it's going to be because of that day we lost Jessica Scarlato on 85 going 90mph. Your tires were smoking. That's all I'm saying.
she was on me like white on freaking rice. i could not escape her. i tell ya-you give her an inch and she takes a mile. you know you went to the mall with her and picked out that red velvet dress she wore to school on the last day, amber.
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